It's 9 am.
I've already showered, had my devotions, washed and dried (but not folded or put away) 3 loads of laundry, baked the days' bread, supervised chores and breakfast, cleaned off my desk. Now it's time to start our "real school day." The first thing we do is open the Word and pray.
Today we are postponed by a child who did a dishwasher loading job carelessly and broke a glass. So I spend nearly 30 minutes cleaning shards of glass from the bottom of the dishwasher and re-rinsing the dirty dishes to be sure there's no more glass. Why this work? We are supposed to be reading the Bible by now! Inside I'm seething, words of anger bubbling to the surface, and praying for God to hold my tongue. So many times the anger has spilled over, wounding the spirit of one of my precious children. I have been so frustrated with how they speak to one another, but where do they learn it? I am their best worst example as we live in these 4 walls together everyday.
Yesterday we brought Teshome forward for covenant baptism and we promised again to raise our children to know their place in God's family. As I long to be sitting now in our almost quiet circle, I can't help but reflect on God's purposes even in the little things. It was His purpose for that child to break a glass, His purpose for me to have to clean it up. His purpose! It is so clear that the lesson He had for ME just now was to show compassion, to serve, to be uplifting to a child who already felt badly about making a mess. Then why do I flail and fight, rather than submit to my Father so much of the time?
I don't know about you, but as a mother of many, I see my sin so clearly! It is so overwhelming at times to have these mirrors of my own imperfection all around me. Oh how I need His grace every MOMENT to fill me, equip me, enable me to serve with joy and show them truly who Christ is- not just by reading the Bible to them at 9 am, but by how I react to their shortcomings.
Lord, help me to show grace to my children as you have shown great grace to me!